Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
