He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
