If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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