Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
