At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
