if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize