Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Sex in the backyard? Check.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
