If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
