is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
