I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
