Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
