Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
