i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
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