at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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