She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
