News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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