Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
sarcasm needs its own font
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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