my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
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