do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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