at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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