you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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