Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
