Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I just threw up on my dentist
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Randomize