Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
