She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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