Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I supernannyed him into submission
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
