There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Randomize
