Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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