Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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