So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
