Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
