that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
