Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Randomize
