He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Randomize
