I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I have tasted many bathrooms
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Randomize
