And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize
