i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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