nut hugger
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize