fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
