Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
