Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
