You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize