and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
so much tequila, so little girl.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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