Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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