I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
