Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
