I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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