Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
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