if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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