I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
