can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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